Sunday, 16th November 2008

Should cohabitation before marriage be encouraged?

Opposition spokesman for youth Owen Bonnici yesterday asked if the time had come to consider encouraging young couples to live together for some time before they get married.

Speaking in Parliament, Dr Bonnici referred to the number of young married people going through separation proceedings and said this was something which should be considered.

Living together before marriage could perhaps help young couples understand what it meant to live with their partner before taking on a much bigger commitment.

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Comments

Paul Vincenti (on 17/11/08)

Living together is not a trial run for marriage. Marriage is quite a different thing indeed. Anyone who has done both will attest to this.
Relationships are not like buying new cloths. You do not try on a relationship, and then change it if it does not fit perfectly. There is no such thing as a trial marriage. Cohabitation is most likely one of the major causes for marriage breakdown later on.

Joseph Calleja (on 16/11/08)

I think this is a practice that's already being explored in Malta. If you look around you might find out that most couples are not married and living together and that includes single parents. That's why I can't figure out the big debate about divorce when half of the couples prefer to living together instead of getting married. Unfortunately this is a new generation with different values even though that does not mean it's all good. As the saying goes, what goes round comes round and what we did in the sixties is coming back to haunt us..

Mary Birncat (on 16/11/08)

Dear Dr. Bonnici
How long a couple should live with each others so they can understand each others and then get through happy-lasting marriage?
Will the couple be allowed to live the co-habitation to the full? Probably yes, then what if the experiment didn’t wok and there will be a baby born? Would the government defray the coast of the experiment?
Don’t you think such a suggestion is putting women dignity at stake?

L Galea (on 16/11/08)

That's nice for the guys.
They just live with a girl for months or several years and then leave on the pretext of not clicking with her and then move to another girl.
That's apart from any children in the process who together with their mother will be lumped on the social services.
Nice and enjoyable jobs waiting for the studs, disaster for the family and the social services.
Such suggestions speak loudly on the quality of the politicians that we are electing to represent us in Parliament.

Steven Grech (on 16/11/08)

@ Joe Camilleri

Couples who cohabit do not understand what marriage is all about, but understand what living with their partner is all about, which then leads to learning how to share your space with another person and respect your partners needs etc etc... If everything works out, the next step is for the couple to get married in order for them to have a family...

If it doesn't work out, if the couple cannot share the same space, then its not meant to be - simple - move on...better breaking up as partners then separating (divorce?) after marriage...especially in a country where separation is "FROWNED" upon!!

Joe Camilleri (on 16/11/08)

The last statment contradicts itself.

"Living together before marriage could perhaps help young couples understand what it meant to live with their partner before taking on a much bigger commitment."

How can couples understand what marriage is by cohabitation when marriage itself is a BIGGER COMMITMENT.