Playing Misty...

While Fatal Attraction is not a remake of Play Misty for Me, it has too many similarities to be ignored.

The media sometimes seem to be a compendium of fractals, where the same issues obtain, again and again, like variations on a theme, a fugue, a rondo.... The comment I passed some columns ago - which was deliberately misconstrued by some and totally identified with by others, is a case in point. It set off a chain reaction from both sides of the fence.

A letter in the October 26 issue of The Sunday Times from the production company that gave us the award-winning A Pinch of Salt, mentioned that another documentary, A Taste of Carob, was deemed by the Broadcasting Authority as having contained an 'an element of advertising'.

This statement would have been funny were it not pathetic. How can you make a documentary about something edible or potable without mentioning end products, or even recipes in which this item is a basic ingredient?

Look (and then look away quickly if you value your time) at most of the cookery slots on local television. Many of the presenters go to great lengths to remove recognisable jars and packets from sets, lest they be accused by the mighty BA of subliminal advertising.

Yet those of us who relish cooking would know what a product looks like the minute a utensil approaches it. There is nothing anybody can do about this, apart from telling these cooks and wannabe-cooks that the Maltese language contains the exact terminology for fry, mushrooms, cloves, leeks, lentils, sauté, and bake. But I digress.

At this juncture, the tendrils from the grapevine reported that PBS also refused to show the BICREF (Biological Conservation Research Foundation) documentary Waves of Life, which focuses on Maltese biodiversity.

Call me insular to the point of being blinkered, call me patriotic to the point of being nationalistic, call me whatever you want, but I cannot for the life of me understand why programmes such as A Taste of Carob and Waves of Life are not broadcast - with repeats of repeats as some silly offerings have been honoured in the past - on the national station and then on all stations, as a celebration of what is ours.

Ironically, one notes that in 2002, BICREF had already, produced a set of six mini documentaries that had been broadcast on different local and foreign television channels. So one wonders why this one, explicitly created to highlight the risks of biodiversity loss, and referring to the United Nations Environment Programme (UNEP) for cetacean conservation, was discarded.

It may be that PBS could not screen it as a one-off, since this would have meant removing something else from the schedule. It could be that since there is already an excellent programme on the Station of the Nation dedicated to things marine, it would have been classified as overkill by those who did not bother to view it. It could be that, as in the case of A Taste of Carob, it might have contained some miniscule element of advertorial matter.

It could be that topics in either documentary are not high on the list of priorities of people who were delegated to take the final decision. Perhaps, as is often the case with scripts, the one for Waves of Life, Protecting our Biodiversity Beyond 2010, contained four-syllable words which would not have existed in the vocabulary of the viewing public.

Could it be the fact that the documentaries were in English was also a factor?

Could it be that these esoteric programmes would not draw advertising revenue to the stations that broadcast them, and so they are not worth the airtime financially, despite being worth their weight in gold when it comes to educating the public?

Waves of Life was broadcast on Net television last Thursday. It is a seamless blend of marine, aerial, and terrestrial footage, accompanied by thoroughly researched information. I suggest that other stations (including PBS) do their 'brand-loyal' viewers a favour and broadcast it too.

Moving beyond these shores, Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross got into more trouble than they bargained for when they made a prank call - which had its basis in truth. This sordid story does not bear repeating, but it serves to highlight the arrogance of some broadcasters who believe that their position behind a microphone makes them untouchable and invulnerable.

Locally, however, people who do candid camera and candid radio skits are apparently immune from comment. So are disc jockeys that play the vilest songs in an effort to pander to the lowest denominator. Sometimes, it seems that certain DJs just grab a handful of CDs and play whatever they find, without having prepared a playlist beforehand. Those of us who tune in to radio for long hours notice these things.

These people do not realise that most people do not listen to radio in the privacy of their own home. Many stations, especially the commercial ones that mostly play music, are the tuning-in choice of shop owners and bus drivers.

Many resent being a captive audience when the likes of Salt and Pepa's Push It come on. This song appears to have replaced another one with questionable lyrics that referred to suicidal tendencies, in vogue some time ago.

In all my (almost) 50 years, I have never, ever heard a DJ apologise for playing any record - except once. The lyrics of that one made a mockery of religion; the DJs reason and excuse was that he had not heard them before he played it.

television@timesofmalta.com