It is a fact that many married couples are encountering problems in their relationships. Instead of trying to look for the cause of such problems and opt for possible solutions some couples are giving up hope and want to resort to divorce. It seems that divorce is the only solution to a breakdown in marriage. By resorting to divorce straightaway one is simply admitting defeat. Why have we lost hope in ourselves and in our ability to mend our ways? Whose married life is not full of problems? Why are we not discussing marriage and the family rather than divorce? Why are we isolating the issue of divorce and considering it as a value in itself - a human right!?

The true value of marriage lies in one's whole and unconditional love for each other. The vow that we give to each other on the day of our wedding has value only inso- far as we remain faithful to our commitment until we die. Marriage is not a one-off occasion but a continuous process of growth in love and understanding through sacrifice, forgiveness, dedication and commitment. Permanence in marriage gives love its real meaning and the vow that we freely pledge to one another on our wedding day is proof that the true meaning of marriage lies in our total commitment and faithfulness. That is why we, Christians, look at marriage as a sacrament - a sacred bond blessed and approved by the Church in the name of Christ. How, then, can divorce fit in this equation? When commenting on divorce Jesus states: "...it (divorce) certainly isn't God's way. For from the very first He made man and woman to be united together permanently in marriage; ... and no man can separate what God has joined together." (Mark 10: 6-9)

If we want our marriage to succeed we have to believe in marriage and in its permanency. We have to want it to succeed and we have to do our utmost to make it succeed. By saying that the only solution to one's breakdown is divorce one is admitting the loss of hope in ourselves both as human beings and as Christians. By having recourse to divorce we are blocking God's grace and not allowing him to come to our rescue. Through the sacrament of marriage we, as Christians, have invited Christ into our lives and whenever we encounter problems it is towards him that we have to look; it is in his power of healing and forgiving that we have to believe. In such a milieu how can a state that believes in the indissolubility of marriage promote divorce? How can we, as members of the Church, be in favour of divorce when for us the bond between husband and wife is a sacrament - a blessing from God through which graces are imparted on us and through which we are sanctified?

Let us discuss marriage, let us discuss the family, let us discuss ways and means of preventing problems and solving them, but let us not discuss divorce in such a way as if it were a value in itself. Let us on the contrary fight the culture of divorce without, though, impeding individuals who sincerely think that they have made a mistake and cannot go on living together from the possibility of having a way out. But let not the exception be the rule. Let divorce be discussed in relation to the family and Christian values. Let us delve into the problems that married couples are facing, knowing very well that married life is not a bed of roses and to live a Christian life requires lots of sacrifices. But let us believe in ourselves, in our capability of mending what has been broken and straightening what has gone crooked. Let us finally, as Christians, believe in God's grace and power. Let us allow him to work in us, because where we can't manage he is ready to take over.