Today's readings: 1 Kings 19, 9. 11-13; Romans 9, 1-5; Matthew 14, 22-33.
In today's readings we have three different situations and characters which clearly speak about the possibility of experiencing God as well as difficulty to do so. Elijah, Paul, and Peter each have their own personal drama with the God they believe in, and the three of them experience God as so near yet so distant. These three men of God represent our strengths and weaknesses where belief is concerned.
In the Gospel account of Jesus walking on water, the imagery acknowledges the dangers we are surrounded with as well as the need to trust in God. As in other Gospel narratives, it is difficult to know precisely where to draw the line between symbolism and history. But the objective of the entire account seems to be the disciples' proclamation at the end that Jesus is the Son of God.
It took so much for the disciples to realise who Jesus was. It was costly for the primitive Church and for later Christians to proclaim Jesus as truly God. Also in our times this continues to be a major challenge. For many, our talk about God is pure fantasy. "It is a ghost", the disciples had exclaimed.
God is always elusive. Problems of belief do not only come from our surroundings. It may be misleading to true discipleship to easily point fingers and find a scapegoat in society as a whole. Today's readings witness to the fact that Elijah himself, Paul, and the disciples already had similar difficulties in their time. So the problem is not just a 21st century issue. The primitive Church, whom Matthew is mainly addressing, was already battling with a heavy sea, struggling with a culture that considered Jesus a ghost, and Jesus himself judged to be a community of little faith.
This is also what we are presented with in the story of Elijah, the prophet of God par excellence, who "went into the cave and spent the night in it". Elijah was a strong man, a courageous prophet, and one who was ready to risk all in God's name. Yet, going into the cave means retreating, escaping, even giving in to the powers that be. This is Elijah's dark night of the soul, similar to that of the disciples on the boat.
From the dark night, God calls for a completely new religious experience. God said to Elijah "Go out and stand on the mountain before the Lord." Elijah knew God's ways and His language, yet he was about to experience something radically new. God is never known. God is new each moment. Our experience of God is never like yesterday's or last year's. Elijah was expecting to find God in the wind, or in the earthquake, or in the fire. He was an old boy, yet here he discovers himself to be only an apprentice in the ways of God. It was the same with Peter, who challenged his Master: "Lord," he said, "if it is you, tell me to come to you across the water."
We constantly challenge God to show that He is God. But God is no less present in our time than he was 50 or 100 years ago. God is always God. From the cave He called Elijah; from the panic on the boat He called Peter; from today's void and confusion of voices, He is still calling on us: "Courage, it's Me. Do not be afraid".
We need to be on the lookout for "the sound of the gentle breeze" from where God continues to speak. Considering our education, we tend to think big and expect to hear God's voice in cataclysms or accidents or holocausts or Twin Towers falling. But those are only the sound of war, evil and other forces present in the world. The sound of God is always gentle, inviting, peaceful. To capture that sound, we have to be still and just listen.