Facts about condoms

I recently bought an interesting book from Preca Library which I read in one day. Standing with Courage - confronting tough decisions about sex (2002) is written by Mary-Louise Kurey, 32, Miss Wisconsin 1999, one of the 51 finalists of the Miss America Pageant 2000 (at age 25), winner of the talent competition and placed among the top ten at the same contest - and an MA in Music and Voice!

Ms Kurey calls herself "rebel for truth". She bases her thesis on the physical consequence of premarital sex, on the comprehensive information she obtains from the Medical Institute for Sexual Health (www.medinstitute.org), which is a non-profit organisation of gynaecologists, paediatricians, and child psychologists dedicated to promoting sexual health, particularly among teens. Another source for her medical and statistical information is the Alan Gunther Institute.

On page 95, Ms Kurey puts these questions to her readers: "Why does society today encourage us to do things that come with such bad consequences? Why don't people ever talk to teens about the serious consequences that come with premarital sex, even 'safe' sex? What about the emotional scars of sexual relationships that don't last? What does having an abortion or a baby out of wedlock mean for these girls' future and their dreams? How come no one ever told us about the tough times that unmarried fathers go through?"

After searching for "unbiased information", the truth without any embellishment or exaggerations, on page 96, she asks more questions: "Why are these facts a secret? Why don't parents tell their children about these things? Or why hadn't our teachers told us? Why don't the members of the media inform the public? Most of all, why does society - which includes television networks, movies, magazines, newspapers and even sex education programmes - promote a big lie? Too many teens and young adults are suffering devastating - and permanent - consequences from choosing to participate in premarital sex. Facing reality is far better than choosing to be ignorant. In this case, what we don't know can hurt us." (p. 97)

"In school we were told: If you use condoms every time you have sex, you won't get pregnant. And yet, 14 to 16 per cent of couples who always use condoms get pregnant in just one year! That's about one of six. On TV and in the movies they refer to condoms as being 'safe'. Why do they lie?" (p. 98). "Statistics are amazing - and horrifying. One out of four sexually active teens has an STD (sexually transmitted disease)." (p.101)

"For the past two decades, sex education programmes have taught us that condoms are 'safe'... The 'safe sex' myth that is promoted by the media and schools across the country is a lie. Millions of young people in my generation are suffering the devastating and permanent impact of sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy outside marriage, and painful emotional scars from having sex too early... from believing a lie." (p. 105).

Mary-Louise Kurey (www.mary-louise.com) is national spokeswoman for the Best Friends Foundation (doctors, counsellors, legislators, authorities (in education), health and family welfare). Her book is a must read for parents, teachers, catechists, priests, social workers, media people, health promoters, psychologists... and for teenagers and young people.