My son's friend

I can now understand why all documents issued by the MLP are branded as simplistic by the less simplistic and more complicated PN strategy group. The MLP has been lambasting the scourge of the friends of friends' network following an analysis of Malta's present administrative situation. Saying "friends of friends" is indeed too simple. One also has to say: cousins of cousins, cousins of brothers-in-law, wives of husbands, friends of sons, daughters of darkness etc.

The Public Accounts Committee managed to extract some interesting facts - which we now all know about - related to how your and my money was spent. In some cases the expression "no comment" was used in reply to a question on how your and my liri were cleverly invested. No comment ?! No comment may only be justified if the speaker's money was involved, not the public's, not the taxpayers, for heaven's sake!

There was also an explanation (not simplistic this one) on why a certain person was given a certain job. Elementary my dear Whatsyourname, he is my son's friend. Oh! So I suppose it's ok then. Thank God for meritocracy redefined!

The answer to the question on why taxpayers' money, including my and your surcharges, was used to buy travel requirements from a particular travel agency, also did not leave you and I the wiser. So carry on not commenting to the public who has the right to your explanations. Arrogance is only short-lived.

Ask Nats outside the selfish inner circle who nowadays grumble about the fact that party-commissioned advice is being ignored.

Ask the Nats who will not renew their membership cards and are being chased in vain. The PN under siege and in a state of panic is capable of pestering ex-Nats even several years after they have quit the introverted party. They will even phone them during election days to cajole them. I know something about it. It's pathetic, really.

I will arrest you

I was planning on taking up filming when I manage to have some free time. But now I don't know. A Super One cameraman was threatened with arrest if he filmed a public hearing which the whole country had the right to witness. This type of investigating exercise can be thoroughly seen on TV stations of many countries and no cameramen are ever threatened with arrest. If they were, they would immediately take out their mobile phone and call Amnesty International, Human Rights Watch and Reporters Without Borders.

Mute TB

In order to look like Christian heroes, some writers do not mention all the facts regarding illegal immigration. Earlier this year, in an answer to a PQ by Joe Debono Grech, we learned that some of our soldiers looking after illegal immigrants had developed Mute TB. Now TB was eradicated from these islands in the 1950s thanks to the efforts of successive PN and MLP administrations. It is unfortunately with us again thanks to people who do not understand that we have no room and no funds for this extra burden.

Here and there you also hear about some illegal immigrant saying that we Maltese will one of these days be in the areas reserved for illegal immigrants and that they will be guarding us. I have also heard someone quote an immigrant gleefully suggesting that we may keep the boats as we will sooner rather than later have to use them ourselves to leave and become illegal immigrants in their place.

When Alfred Sant mentioned national interest with regard to this problem, he was ridiculed by Lawrence Gonzi with raised, shocked arms as if he had uttered some blasphemy. I also heard that some PN candidates doing their door-to-door blessings-my-dear hear lots of Nats grumble about the fact that the PN government has done very little about this national problem. What I can't understand is why the answer they often get is in the form of a pantomime: joined hands as if in prayer and eyes upturned to heaven. I wonder who they are trying to make fun of.

One small big woman

Astrid Vella, a militant environmentalist as yours truly, has done a great deal to defend the right of our children to breathe oxygen instead of concrete dust and other pollution. It was to be expected that adorers of this infallible regime would attack and try to find some fault with her. Indeed they sniffed into the archives of the existence of human nature and found that her and my great grand parents Adam and Eve had committed some bureaucratic mistake. Hypocrisy is alive and well among the fans of developers.

Hijacked laurels

I usually stop calling a journalist "serious" when he knows he is reshaping the truth and carries on doing it even after having been found out. It is no secret that Labour MEPs have a record of successes which goes beyond expectations. This is indeed why the Maltese wanted them where they are in a majority and why they want to have four of them next time. It's a simple case of trust and competence. Some ex-serious journalists keep trying to hijack these laurels and place them on the heads of cuckoos usurping other birds' nests. No matter how much you try to cough using someone else's mouth, or wax musical with someone else's instrument, you will hardly manage to convince by transparent bluff.

Divorce : a matter of time

Whether we admit or not, EU membership will lead, before 2008, to an obligatory divorce law by gradual implementation. Once the PN had found a compromise with its aborted "cohabitation law" but humbly dumped this initiative probably as a result of confessional pressure. Amen. The European Commission is the one putting on pressure now. Imminent divorce legislation obligations will include: (1) the right of a Maltese person married to a non-Maltese EU "national" to apply for divorce in any EU country. (Before only the non-Maltese party could apply, though rich Maltese - even those married to a Maltese spouse - found a way of applying too in a situation that unconstitutionally discriminated against the poor.) (2) All EU nationals will have the right to apply for divorce in the Maltese courts. The next step will be the right of the Maltese to apply for divorce in Malta.

Gay bashers

On July 22 in Riga (Latvia) a gay rights manifestation was brutally attacked by the ANSS - the Latvian extreme right. ANSS leader Viktors Biese declared: "Homosexuals are dirty sinners. They are immoral people and there is no room for them in a normal society". This intolerant "normalisation" language was used by nazism and still is by religious fundamentalists. Europe today is giving more rights to the gay community and Parliament after Parliament is legislating in this direction.

Patchworks

The burdens on the population will soon be relieved as a pre-electoral measure. VAT will be reduced on shoe and clothes mending. It will, however, not be reduced on educational and medical expenses. In Europe, VAT will be eased on house improvement projects. But patchworks in Malta have never been so popular. Especially those of woollen cloth with pumpkin.

Best lapsus

The best lapsus I have seen recently was in this paper on July 25 where a correspondent speaks of the "Super 5 tottery". Very interesting.

Dr Licari teaches psycholinguistics, sociolinguistics and geolinguistics at the Department of French of the University of Malta.