A final farewell to Rachel

After five seemingly interminable years, the case regarding the death of my daughter Rachel was finally concluded in the law courts on June 13.

The jury found three members of the Decelis family guilty of homicide by omission, in effect watching and waiting as life ebbed away from my daughter without informing any of the competent authorities.

As Mr Justice Joseph Galea Debono emphasised in his address, the real crime was that Rachel was in a state of helplessness for between eight and 12 hours, unable to come to her own aid, while those in a position to save her life looked on, and callously allowed this young, vulnerable and vibrant woman to lose her fight for life.

A thousand sentiments and a million words of sorrow, however well intended, will never restore Rachel to us. She has gone from us forever, and only our memories remain. I cannot begin to describe her loss.

For a parent to lose his or her child is the worst imaginable cut of all. No one can possibly understand this feeling of devastation unless they too have suffered a similar fate. If you think you can, you're wrong. And how.

Whenever I see another young woman of Rachel's age I am always reminded that she will never know the joys of motherhood, of having her own children, and of living a normal fulfilled life which most of her contemporaries accept as their right. And for me, selfishly I admit, there is the knowledge that I will never know the feeling of happiness and pride, as any father, in taking my daughter down the aisle, or of being a grandfather to her children, or simply having her fun-filled company again.

I think how unlucky she was to have rid herself of the curse of narcotics, resumed her studies, found a new life, a job she enjoyed, the forging of good friends in Gozo, and embarked on a new and happy phase of her life, only to lose it through a final unpredicted event which triggered her date with destiny.

If you were a student of statistical probabilities you would be excused for thinking that the chances of losing your mother and your own life at such a tender age would seem impossibly slim. But life occasionally unearths some totally unexpected events, and tragically this was one of them.

I cannot leave this piece without acknowledging our deepest thanks to the long and arduous work carried out by the Republic of Malta in successfully prosecuting this case. A trial of this nature was a first for Malta, and fraught with difficulties, as homicide by omission had never previously been argued.

On behalf of all those who loved and cared for Rachel I extend my thanks, firstly, to the judge and jury, to the Prosecuting counsel Dr Anthony Barbara, and to the Police led by Assistant Commissioner Michael Cassar and Superintendent Neil Harrison.

Our family sincerely appreciates your collective vision to ensure that justice was done. Thanks also to all those court attendants who showed kindness and understanding, and other well-wishers who took the time out to contact me during the case.

Already events will have superseded the news of this trial. Life goes on in the wider world, with new issues confronting us. This is as it should be. It was never my intention to keep this story on the front page, but to pay my final respects to Rachel, and to set the record straight. Now that I have achieved this aim my task is concluded as far as the wider public is concerned.

For us though, and all those who loved Rachel, we shall treasure her memory. And as a father who lost the best present a man can have, I can only beg all other parents that when tucking up their children in bed tonight, under whatever the circumstances, to thank whoever is your God for your gift.

For my Rachel: may you find in the next life the peace that eluded you so cruelly in this one.

Rachel Bowdler (January 21, 1983 - May 13, 2001)