"Our next caller on the line is... um, Gracie from Hal-Qormi. Hallo Gracie... er hallo!... Gracie, are you there? Obviously not, so we'll move right on to - "

"All - o!"

"Oh right, you are there. Is that Gracie from Hal-Qormi?... She seems to have gone again so -"

"All - o!"

"Or maybe not, is that Gracie from Qormi?"

"Ehe!"

"Terrific! So tell me and the listeners, what are you doing with yourself today Gracie?"

"All - o!"

"Hallo Gracie!"

"All - o!"

"Were you about to tell me what you are doing with yourself today?"

"All - o!"

"Answering the phone, obviously. But is anything exciting happening in your life today, Gracie?"

"This where I win pizza for two at... ma nafx fejn... "

"You can indeed win a pizza for two at Pizza Palazzo, Zurrieq. Yes that's quite correct, Gracie. But first you have to answer a simple general knowledge question. And if... if you get it right, Gracie, your name will go into the draw and... if your name is drawn at the end of the week, it will then go into the grand prize draw, where you could win a pizza for two at Pizza Palazzo, Zurrieq. Tell me Gracie, if you win... who are you going to take with you to Pizza Palazzo, Zurrieq?... "

"All - o!"

"Oh dear, I think we lost Gracie again there for a mom - "

"All - o!"

"Ah you're back... super! So Gracie, if you win the pizza for two, who are you going to share with?"

"So I don't win nothing?"

"Not yet Gracie, but you could win that delicious pizza for two at Pizza Palazzo, Zurrieq. First Gracie... could you tell me please: Who will be representing Malta in this year's Eurovision Song Contest? ... Hallo Gracie, are you still there?"

"Ehe!"

"Did you understand the question?"

"Ehe!"

"It's a really easy one, isn't it?"

"Er..."

"Come on Gracie, you know the answer, don't you? Singing for Malta in this year's Eurovision Song Contest will be Fab... Fab..."

"I don't know but..."

"Fab - Fabriz..."

"U iva! Chiara."

"No, Gracie... not Chiara. That was last year and anyway, does Fabriz sound like Chiara?"

"All - o!"

"I know what we'll do, Gracie. We'll spin a disc and... while it's spinning you can have a good think of the answer, or telephone a friend, to see if he or she knows. OK then, here we go with a real oldie... It's Elvis with Wooden head... er, I mean, heart..." (The disc plays)

"There you go, a real boom from the tomb and I expect that brought back memories for all you geriatrics out there. Right, well we still have Gracie from Qormi on the line... unfortunately. Still there, Gracie?"

"All - o!"

"Yes, she's still there. So can you give me the answer to our simple general knowledge question, to see if you will go into the draw for the draw to see who wins our fabulous prize of a pizza for two at Pizza Palazzo of Zurrieq. Who, Gracie... will be representing Malta in this year's Eurovision Song Contest?"

"Next Saturday I want for it."

"Uh... want for what Gracie?"

"To make it the pizza for two, eh!"

"Um that won't actually be possible Gracie... because the draw to see who goes into the draw for the... oh sod it! Hey! We seem to have lost Gracie, never mind let's take another caller. Better luck this time eh? Hallo!"

"All - o!"

"And who am I talking to this time?"

"All - o!"

"You've only uttered one... or is that two words, but could that be Gracie from Qormi again?"

"Ehe."

"Oh dear, all the phone lines to Qormi seem to be down. What a shame. That means I'm going to be denied the pleasure of engaging in intellectual banter with Gracie once again. Hey ho! Let's try yet another caller. Hallo! Who's that?"

"All - o!"

"I resign!"