The loss of a baby

The recent spate of articles concerning the right of parents to private burial of miscarried foetuses has focused public opinion on this very delicate matter.

SANDS (Stillbirth And Neonatal Death Society) Malta, a voluntary support group within the Cana Movement, and affiliated with SANDS UK, are primarily concerned with the welfare of bereaved parents who during the period following baby loss go through unimaginable heartache. The loss of a baby, at any stage of the pregnancy, is a traumatic experience for the parents and for the whole family. SANDS provide a support group for those bereaved parents who may want to share the burden and work through their loss.

SANDS have always believed that bereaved parents should have the right to privately bury their miscarried foetuses and had asked the authorities to provide this right. But bereaved parents should be left at liberty to choose whether to bury their miscarried foetus privately or collectively, without the added burden of public opinion on what is "the right thing" to do.

Following the loss of a foetus through miscarriage, the pain felt by the parents may be so great that they might not want to or are unable to go through the added anguish of organising a funeral.

The editorial (April 15) and an opinion piece by Maurice Cauchi (April 13) may be read to cast doubts on the dignity and respect afforded to miscarried foetuses during the communal burial service.

Six years ago, SANDS, in cooperation with all the relevant authorities, started organising a communal burial service for all foetuses miscarried before the viability date or of less than 500g weight.

The process leading to the communal burial service starts with all the parents being informed individually of the burial date. All foetuses are collected inside the mortuary room. Each foetus is then removed from Formalin, hand washed and placed inside a purposely handmade satin pocket. The satin pockets containing the foetuses are then placed inside a purposely made and hand-decorated casket.

The casket is then taken to the Santa Marija Addolorata Cemetery by hearse, where Mass presente cadavere is celebrated. The ceremony is very well attended by bereaved parents and family. All parents are also given a memento of the occasion. Following Mass, the burial itself takes place at the purposely designated gravesite.

The whole burial ceremony not only provides a dignified burial for the miscarried foetuses but also gives the parents a sense of closure. It acknowledges the existence and loss of a precious life for the parents, while the burial site itself is a focal point for bereaved parents.

Parents can now choose between privately burying their miscarried foetuses, or opting for the communal burial service. Parents must be allowed to make this choice without the unnecessary pressure of public opinion generated by the publicity given to this private issue and in the knowledge that whatever they decide for their foetuses, the miscarried foetuses will be buried with the same dignity and respect as any other human being.