Sign of the times

"The Church spends thousands of liri on its marriage tribunal to dissolve marriages, but does not a give a penny to the Cana Movement. Not a penny in 50 years!"

It is Fr Charles Vella, the founder of the Cana Movement, which is celebrating its 50th anniversary this month, who makes such a statement.

"How can we continue saying we are afraid of the future and of divorce - always scaring people - without offering any help?"

At the moment, there are 520 cases for annulment before the Church Marriage Tribunal and 90 at appeal stage - indications that the Maltese family has many pressures from within and without.

But Fr Vella is not at all pessimistic. "The only answer is to educate families. To do so, however, the Cana Movement needs more support. The Community Chest Fund, banks and other fund-raisers help charitable institutions, but not Cana, which needs financial assistance for its many services. Why?"

The institution of marriage is in a crisis and will continue to be, but the family network and ties, if well supported, will never disappear, Fr Vella maintains.

"I do not want to be a prophet for the future of the Maltese family, but I think it still stands like the bastions of Valletta, although the institution of marriage is in a crisis.

"It is up to governments to see what and how they should tackle today's needs. I do not think we should be afraid, even if divorce were to be introduced to Malta one day. If we educate and form good Christians and Catholics, it is then up to their conscience to decide," Fr Vella says on the delicate subject of divorce.

Speaking about other delicate topics, such as contraception, Fr Vella maintains that the Church synods, which he hopes will be different from the previous, will have to discuss these issues. He fully shares Milan Archbishop Cardinal Carlo Maria Martini's agenda on what needs to be discussed by the world's bishops: the question of celibacy, the role of women in the Church, marriage, sexuality and divorce.

With regard to women staying home and looking after the family, Fr Vella says that, 50 years ago, he was already talking about women going out to work, causing "chaos" with his statements. "But where would the world be without women?" he passionately asks. "Where would the Church be without women? I would not have had a Cana Movement. We need to give women their role in the Church," he says, adding that there are probably more women saints than men!

Fr Vella maintains that the Church is still "very celibate towards women". Up until only a few years ago, young seminarians were told in their formation to shun and mistrust women, he says. "But who was Our Lady? So for heaven's sake, let us open our hearts and minds."

Fr Vella's interest in marriage dates back over 50 years, when the avant-garde 20-year-old, then not yet a priest, had the foresight to recognise the need to set up the Cana Movement. "To be honest, I often ask myself how this bug entered my mind. How did I have this intuition?"

His friends, who were engaged and wanted to get married, reasoned that he was in Rome, studying for seven years to become a priest, while they were getting married without any preparation whatsoever. It was this issue that got the seminarian going.

The Cana Movement was born of a small group meeting, but today it is a full-blown organisation, offering numerous services and involving 900 volunteers and 22 counsellors.

Fr Vella got bolder, or "crazier", as he puts it, and more and more couples from all over Malta converged to the conferences he organised.

Times were different then, and some parents objected, sending chaperones with the couples, but Fr Vella insisted they wait outside. Other couples were simply forbidden to attend by their parents, and Fr Vella, who seemed to be "making a big noise", was looked upon with suspicion. He spoke about sexuality, still a taboo, and family planning, which was an innovative subject even in Europe, and it was feared the movement was going to be "revolutionary".

The opposition came from various sections of the clergy and from conservative lay people, but the late Archbishop Michael Gonzi always supported the movement and was the one to give the green light. "I was surprised when he told me to go along and set up the movement because he was a rather strong and conservative person."

The year after the inauguration of "my baby" on January 8, 1956, Mgr Gonzi was "bold" enough to say that it was "providential" for Malta and that he would judge it from its fruit.

"If the Cana Movement was then providential, today, I think it is indispensable," Fr Vella adds.

His impressively accurate memory allows him to recall each and every person who supported him - and even those who stood in his way. "Just five hours before the first national Cana conference at the Floriana government school, the then Deputy Prime Minister Joseph Ellul Mercer called me to tell me off and prevent me from using the venue. He was very arrogant and threw us out, but I refused to cancel and found another venue," Fr Vella recalls.

"Mgr Gonzi wanted the movement to spread around the whole island, but at the time, some parishes, particularly Zebbug, closed the door in my face," he recalls.

"I had the blessing of the Church, but I did not have much help. I had the support of some and the opposition of others in and outside the Church. But I understand. If you go back 50 years, this was a new thing. The family was a closed unit and society was closed too. Malta was really an island - isolated from everyone - and the Maltese had fears and doubts. I do not blame them; I forgive them."

As regards the Maltese family, although the situation was not what it is today, "the problems were always there," Fr Vella maintains. "Then, we were just seeing the tip of the iceberg, but now the problems have been magnified. Once the doors were opened up, the floods came in."

The interest shown in the movement proved to Fr Vella that there was a need for it. "I could see that the walls of the Maltese homes were cracking and I tried to fill the gaps with the 'concrete' of teaching."

The next step - another first - was to set up the Marriage Advisory Council and establish marriage counselling services.

"People did not even know the meaning of counselling and some members of the clergy confused it with confession." As a "realist, not a pessimist", Fr Vella maintains that the Maltese family is not crumbling, "but I see it like the masterpiece of Caravaggio, with shades of dark and light. And, as Dostoyevsky used to say, most families are happy families. However, we cannot bury our heads in the sand and we have to admit that the Maltese family has changed".

In the words of former UK Prime Minister Harold Macmillan, "the winds of change" are blowing in Malta. "Sometimes, it could be a storm, but it is not a tsunami," Fr Vella believes.

"I am pleased that the new Gozo Bishop, Mgr Mario Grech, has said his priority is going to be the family, because the future of Malta depends on the family. It is the country's patrimony and it is what we have to strengthen...

"Malta has joined the EU, it has thought all about the money, the economics and the trade, but it has not really thought about the values of the family. Though some politicians have spoken of values in the past, they have often done so in an abstract and political way to promote their own good."

For Fr Vella, the crisis lies in the issue of values. "I am not talking about traditional values; I am not nostalgic about the past and putting yesterday's family on a pedestal. That is rubbish! I am looking at the future...

"Young people today are confused about values: firstly because they do not see them practised in their own families and, secondly, because society itself has become very unethical. People have to conform to be like the rest; otherwise they are out!

"We live in a consumer, use-and-throw-away society, but we have to realise that values are not bought; they are transmitted by the family, society and the Church."

Although he does not consider Malta to be a value-free society yet, like some other post-Christian European countries, Fr Vella fears that despite the many prayer groups on the island, the high degree of religiosity and the record of Mass attendance on the continent, "we are not really going to the root of the problems in the family and prescribing the real remedy".

Education is the way forward, and Fr Vella only hopes the teaching of values would be given due priority in the reform in schools "as this is where the future lies".

A media man at heart - Fr Vella was in charge of religious broadcasting for 20 years and started the press office of the Curia - he has been living in Milan for the last 31 years, where he was called to help the Italian Church establish marriage counselling centres in 120 dioceses.

The ball has not stopped rolling since and there have been many highlights and achievements along the way, including eight years at the Council of Europe, four of which as the first priest ever to occupy the role of chairman of the Family and Social Policy Committee, as well as his leap onto the "fast-moving train" of San Raffaele Hospital in Milan, among others.

Although he is officially a pensioner, the last five weeks have seen him catch 10 flights, so he can hardly be described as taking a back seat.

"I have entrusted myself to God. My life is not mine. I was a pencil in God's hand - those multi-coloured pencils - and sometimes He helped me to write in black, or blue, or red, or white, according to the need and the mood.

"I hope to remain in Milan for many reasons and also because I know the Cana Movement is in the good hands of Fr Louis Camilleri, its director, and Anna Maria Vella, the president. It is great to have a woman as president of the movement" - indirectly, probably again, the fruit of his work.

"I never thought I would have the grace to see this small seed grow in Malta and abroad, but I retain I was only a pencil in God's hands as blessed Mother Teresa used to say."

Fr Vella is the author of Sinjali Maltin ta' Zmienna.