Actively against alternation

The more places you live in, locally and abroad, the more interesting neighbours you have the joy of knowing. A colleague of mine once told me that his neighbour and his missus moved furniture around every time they came back home after a family outing. This could be in the morning, afternoon or in the middle of the night. I explained to my friend that the relief from agoraphobia may channel recent anxiety to artistic creativity in home decoration.

Another neighbour had "yardly" musical habits. These are not related to singing while applying make-up and perfume. No, this neighbour took her drums out into the yard and beat them euphorically to the enjoyment of other residents' cochlear doldrums. Some species also do this in a jungle.

One outstanding example I came across was a neighbour I used to have. He reminded me of Karl Friedrich Hieronymus - Baron Von Munchhausen. He must have been proud of possessing dozens of electric drills and every Saturday and Sunday he enjoyed punching holes into our common wall. I told him he might use my front door if he wanted to invite himself to tea. He did not understand. No wonder "drill" also means "baboon".

The Baron also purchased all kinds of electro-mechanical contraptions to prove to himself and to others that he could compensate technologically for lack of intellectual investment. All over his abode, especially atop his roof, he displayed his vibrating machines to all neighbours who desired nothing more than peace and harmony. But he was convinced that he had gone a long way in his evolution since his Flintstone origins. I wished him many things, but never to become a struldbrug.

Tony's triumph

Lots of conservatives had told me that Tony Zarb's re-election as secretary general of the GWU would be a positive thing for the PN. These people have a bad habit of confusing me, for I don't know why they are now seething at the teeth and nostrils following Tony's triumph. I think that I am now beginning to understand the sour grapes syndrome and the excruciating hypocrisy.

These people had already said the same thing about Alfred Sant's continuing leadership of the MLP. For, if Dr Sant at the helm of the MLP is helpful to the PN's re-election, why shake in anger at his cruising on?

Sometimes I think that conservatives and capitalists wish to commit political suicide by divulging what's bad for them and good for their rivals. And, darn it, every time they organise a campaign against someone, that same one manages to become even more popular! This is indeed a hard nut to crack for the PN's ad hoc intelligent strategy group - which continues to concoct strategy even after the Marsa and Zejtun aborted local elections. And this is incredible, especially since the Minister of Health reaffirmed in a recent article that vox populi vox dei.

The pride of militancy

Reading the pained patriotic patter of demi-christians on militancy almost makes me believe that this is a dirty word. However, I am used to living in Europe where militancy is considered a virtue and where most teachers and lecturers praise the militancy of the trade unions to which they belong. One should not be surprised that trade unionism feels more comfortable within the leftist fold. For, as soon as a trade union ceases to be leftist and militant, it becomes a social club striving to adapt itself to capitalistic manipulations. So roll on, Tony. Your militancy is the workers' survival.

Fascism gently promoted

Some of my best acquaintances are friendly Nats and I hope the Lord will bless them for providing me with many ideas. I also thank Unesco for struggling for the survival of dwindling cultural minorities. My Nat friends argue that, though they are worried about the mess the PN has put the country in, they believe this nation should have a permanent PN government since they did not like the management during MLP administrations. To them this is some kind of logic.

However, hollering for permanent governance by the same party is, and there's no other word for it, a love of fascism. Indeed, even those correspondents who claim that a government should be hostile to alternation as their rivals' record is not to their liking, are doing nothing less than promoting fascism. Let's not forget that fascism evolved from simple paralogistic arrogance and the conceit that political putrid permanence is justified by the dislike of rivals' style.

Leave them kids alone

During the last years young people have been hoodwinked in many ways. They were told that European universities would be free and swing their doors wide open for them. That thousands of job opportunities would be available locally and especially in Europe. That educational material would be more accessible. That housing problems for young couples would be alleviated. That students' stipends would not be touched.

The reality is that easy and free entry to European universities is a farce. That unemployment among youth is rife both here and in Europe. That an 18 per cent VAT is now clamped on books. That housing has become horribly expensive. That stipends have been cut down when the cost of living has gone up. At this stage I cannot but remember the PM's words on the Granaries: Min dahaq b'min? (Who fooled who?).

Tutemba

Before anybody says that the above word is not acceptable in the Anglo-Saxon world, I say that it is and you may look it up. Tutemba may also mean "derogation" and it reminds me of Maltese far right absent-mindedness. This movement is annoyed at the many shades of brown people getting jobs in Malta. In EU countries there are at least 20,000,000 people wearing a darker shade of pale and they all have European passports. The EU is said not to be like a restaurant menu from which you choose what you fancy. Indeed, EU regulations state that each country must admit and employ any EU person desiring to enter and work. In a few years' time, when the tutemba is over, many persons whose colour is only a lighter shade of black will have the right to come from Europe, live here, work here and partake of our social services. What will the far right do then?

Message to my minister

Following the PN secretary general's reassurance that our PM is so much tal-genn (exciting) that he answers the common citizen's e-mails the same day or at most the next day, I said to myself: The PM is a busy man. The minister is a less busy man. Ergo, if the PM answers e-mails after a few hours, the minister answers them after a few minutes. The fact is, however, that the many times I tried to reach the Minister of Education, he did not answer the same month or the same year. Should the Minister of Education thus be above the PM, i.e. President of the Republic?

Linguistic tango

With the recent modification of fuel prices, I consider myself as the lucky winner of an "upward adjustment" in petrol price. For this is what price increases are called nowadays. This is indeed very jolly and optimistic and it makes you feel like clapping your hands and stamping your feet for having more of your earnings extracted out of your reluctant pocket. May I suggest a better expression for "price increase"? "A harmonious lofty elevation of previous value." When this expression is accepted as much as the "eco contribution", we can all go out into the streets and klaxon our horns until liri of fuel evaporate inside a thin matter of adjustment of metres.