Focus on the cause not the symptoms

"Seventy-five per cent of teenagers who visit the Genito-Urinary Clinic to test for sexually transmitted diseases admit that they do not use condoms or any form of contraception when having sex" (December 2).

This is a very sad statement indeed, confirming what by and large we had already known, namely that our teenagers are in a very high percentage sexually active. It is even sadder to note that society, the fomenter of such a situation, is offering nothing but condoms to these persons and this to prevent disease.

Is disease the only harm that can befall teenagers who liberally engage in sexual activity at such a tender age?

Why are we so hypocritical and continue to condone such behaviour? Is this sexual activity that is claimed as a right of passage by our sons and daughters an expression of true freedom and self-fulfilment?

Why have we become so reluctant to air the roots of our social malaise and this in the name of freedom and tolerance?

Our young ones are the first victims of this burying of the truth. We are all rushing to address the symptoms and ignoring the causes.

If we want our teenagers to lead a truly healthy life physically, emotionally and morally, we must offer them an alternative to condoms. We have to talk convincingly about abstinence. Yes abstinence.

Sexual abstinence is not cowardly, it is not prudish and it is not old fashioned. Sexual abstinence requires conviction, strength of character, courage and a high self-esteem.

Sexual abstinence ensures that our sons and daughters are not used as articles of commodity to be disposed of as and when needed. According to figures quoted in the same article "50 per cent of teenagers also admitted having casual sex on one-night stands when they cannot recall the name of the partner". Can anybody justify or glorify such behaviour?

My appeal goes to the parents. Refuse to give up on your obligation to give your sons and daughters real healthy values.

New research indicates that parents have far greater influence on their children's sexual decision-making than previously thought. Apparently, what parents say does matter when it comes to preventing teen pregnancy. Over two decades of study (in the United States) confirm that families - particularly parents - are important influences on whether their teenagers become sexually active. Studies reveal that parent/child closeness is associated with reduced teen pregnancy risk. The closer teens are to their parents, the more likely they are to remain sexually abstinent.

So if you are thinking about handing your teens a condom, don't. You would be better off giving them yourself - your views, your expectations, your values, your unconditional love. One survey of American youth by the Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy revealed that teens today want their parents to talk with them about sexuality issues.

If parents do not, there are others who are all too happy to fill young minds with their own thoughts on teen sexuality (cfr. Abstinence. It works every time from the Catholic Educators Resource Centre at http://www.catholiceducation. org).

So parents, be strong and show the courage of your convictions to your sons and daughters with love and respect. You can go a longer way than those who profess to offer the solutions to the symptoms but refuse to address the cause. And we all know what the cause is, a very deep and quick moral decline whose end results are not happiness and peace but disease and inquietude.