Respect and responsibility

In The Times of June 27, the Maltese bishops expressed their rightful concern about a recommendation that the European Parliament approve a resolution calling for abortion to become legal in all EU member states and candidate countries.

The resolution was in fact approved by the European Parliament last Wednesday.

When the culture of abortion takes hold, it is like a tidal wave and one feels helpless to stem it, one feels outnumbered. Yet there is something inside every one of us live individuals, the lucky ones to be here alive, that tells us it is wrong.

I will take only two words out of the bishops' statement - "respect" and "responsibility". The rest of the EU's thinking in this mandate is purely economic and social policy, cold and clinical, not sensitive to the individual but considering the subject as academic and global, not human.

Having lived in a country that is now seeing that tidal wave of abortion syndrome, i.e., serious depression and permanent guilt feelings at their panic-stricken actions, I found that statement extremely sad, more so, because I have worked in the pro-life industry with LIFE (Save the U*nborn Child) and see the pain. Where do we go from here?

Let's go back to "respect". This starts in the cradle and today's child gets little of that as it is, hence their attitude. Today, women in general think of comfort; sterilisation, contraception, epidureals, caesareans, bottle-fed babies, anything to minimise their being inconvenienced, and their eventual quick escape to the world of work rather than the world of motherhood, which is loving and spending hours with their new little treasures.

"Choice" they call it, and science and medicine have provided them amply with that. Result? Grannies are now big business as daughters are quickly back at work after the birth of their "hanini", making money for the bigger houses, holidays, yachts, etc., and who blames them? We have provided them with the wherewithal and everybody is doing it, so am I going to be left at home?

Then, as baby gets older, it is Cartoon Network and TVs in every room in case darling is bored and starts to have a tantrum which we cannot cope with, as we are on the mobile phone planning our evening's entertainment!

So, the gap between mother and child is widening and Granny sees the first smile, first tooth, first step and so on. What a lot today's Mummy misses as she takes her precious darling to baby-minding or kindergarten from a few months old! A gift from God, given away in the cause of inconvenience, never to return. Oh, how precious are those baby coos and screams too! It is baby's first words to Mamas and they are not there to hear them!

Then "responsibility". Husbands and wives are so concerned with their own agendas and separate lives that they have ceased to consider "our life" but only think of the "me" life, with disastrous consequences. If today provides better concepts of marriage than yesterday, why so many separations and divorces, can someone tell me?

You see, marriage is a sacrament and that is something that we all forget in our pre-marriage quest for the right church, flowers, reception, dress and veil. All this takes over and we overlook the fact that marriage is a sacrament and that God is involved in it with us! Yes, He is!

The couple that prays together stays together" we were told years ago, and how true! We humans are like papier-mâché without God's help, His love, forgiveness, patience and forbearance. After all, marriage is not a Dallas affair, it is laying down of a life for another, a sacrifice, and who better than God to help us carry it out? If we bring Him into the situation instead of despairing and running away from our problems into the courtrooms, our faith would be rewarded by compromise and acceptance of the fact that we are definitely not perfect and neither are our partners!

Respect and responsibility for our bodies and those of others? Where is that when we watch our young exchange syringes, use condoms, etc? No, the culture of choice is not the answer. Difficult though it is today, we must stem the tide of so-called "progress" as we are on a very slippery slope and the next generation will be even more frightful than today's teenagers. Where is romance? One-night stands do not give them a chance as they hardly know each others' names, voices and characters before they are far too close for "comfort"! We have to educate our children to look at each other with love. Remember Jesus' famous last words? "Love one another as I have loved you."

Yes, the world has to go back to God and re-read His message in the Bible. The European Parliament has nothing new to teach us as they are only trying to redress the mistakes of abortion laws which have gone sour and caused much pain.

Growing up is painful enough so let us not make it even more complicated for our children by letting them watch the confounded "box" and learn too early that man meets woman means "tonight's the night". That need not be! Getting to know each other is beautiful, so let them not miss out on "falling in love".

Falling into bed leads to pregnancies, protection or not. Teach your children that the man who waits for your body till marriage night has more chance of being a faithful husband than the other sort! May sound impossible but it isn't! May also sound old-fashioned but please do not disillusion the young. Life is difficult enough.